Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Plans

When I decided that I wanted to have another baby at the end of 2008, I figured it would happen right away with no stress or delay, just like it did with my first two children. After a couple of months of not getting the "two lines" result I wanted I wondered why I had not become pregnant according to my plan.

Now, I know why:


Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

After we found out that Logan has Down syndrome I didn't ask God "Why me? Why did you do this to me?" However, I did ask God, "Why me? Why did you choose me?" I wanted to know how my life was going to unfold because of this little blessing. I knew that this meant my life would be different than I had planned. It was, however, no different than what God had planned.

To think that things would have worked out better according to my plan. To think of how scared I was to have a child with Down syndrome. To think that given any other month of conception and Logan would not be here. To think that my life would not have been enriched and my eyes have not been opened. To think that I would not have become closer to God. Well...it's just all unthinkable. I'm so glad that God knows better than me. I'm so glad that I am not in control. I'm so glad that He knows the plans He has for me.

Trust Him, my friends. Trust Him.

2 comments:

  1. Amen.

    How grateful I am for Abby! For the joy she is in my life. When we lost her twin, I really thought that there was no meaning behind me getting pregnant with two. I questioned 'why' as well.

    Then we learned that the one we lost probably had chromosomal abnormalities as well. It changed my perspective. We didn't lose the twin for good- we just have to find her. And we plan to through Reece's Rainbow.

    Sorry. Highjacked your post. I was just thinking about all of those things. God's hand in our lives. So real. SO very very real.

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